Wanderlust

I am not a flighty person, but I just can't seem to pass up an opportunity when it presents itself. I have been at the Library for 10 years come August, and between term positions, contracts, and 'opportunities', I have had - lemme see - nine different jobs there. The current job is one that I've been in for 1.5 years, and it's awesome.

But...

Now there's a job available that would give me more supervisory responsibilities than I have now, and it would allow me to do a lot of visioning, experimenting with successful service models, and would let me have my fingers in many, many projects. I didn't apply for it when it was posted a few months ago internally (inside the Library), but somehow I've completely come around since then. I took a really interesting pre-conference session at SLA on advocacy, and I think that's playing a big part. I think that with the right approach, I can be part of the development of some really cool things.

They have just posted the job externally, so the whole world (okay, the whole world of librarians) can apply for it. I should be upset that I didn't get in there when it was internal, but a perverse part of me is pleased that I'm competing with the world. I've been competing internally for 10 years, so I have no real idea of my worth against the masses. It might be nice to see where I come out.

One thing that was really holding me back from applying this time was the idea of leading a group of people toward a common goal. The other night, though, Jim and I sat on the couch and talked about it. I work with a lot of very talented people, and suddenly I realized that I think of them like a sort of a family. I'm afraid to lead a 'bunch of people', but I'm not afraid to lead THIS bunch of people that I know. I think I have the mutual respect of at least a few of them, and that makes all the difference.

Now I'm all gung-ho creating my vision for the future, etc. I still love my current job, so if I don't get the new one, I'll be fine. It wouldn't really hurt me to stay in a job for three years like a normal person either. Of course, if I do get the new one, I'll be ten for ten.

(And I'm not a normal person. I'm a squirrel. I keep forgetting.)