Tuesday, June 22, 2004

My Aunt Frieda - Oracle

My Aunt Frieda is an oracle. For the Big Guy. That's right. God talks to her.

But sometimes the messages are a bit puzzling, and sometimes they're downright annoying. Especially if they're about you.

A few weeks before my sister's wedding to Vinnie, Aunt Frieda told her that 'God told me you'd marry someone from Biggar." Vinnie is not from Biggar. How is this news constructive? Should my sister have called off the wedding? 'Oops, sorry Vinnie! This just in!! Newsflash from the Creator! I can't marry you.'

I once broke up with a guy, and I was very sad about it. Being eternally helpful, Aunt Frieda said smugly, "God told me that you were never meant to be with Bill because he can't have any children." Oh, whew, narrow escape for me, thanks A.F.

Lookin' for signs, lookin' for signs. Man's search for meaning.

That's my Aunt Frieda.


Blogger Eileen said...

a reminder from sister who is lazy and uses no capitals: recall that we all decided god told A.F. that i was to marry "someone bigger" and she just mis-heard his message. Vinnie is indeed of the large sort; also known as "Big Vinnie", with caps.

Big Vinnie's old lady

5:09 am  

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